Found And Lost

It seems like only yesterday that some of my desk surface was visible, but it apparently wasn’t and I have been asked to excavate. Among my findings:

  • Fifty-six copies of PC Gamer 148’s cover CDs.
  • One wicker apple, without lid, empty save pistachio-shell crumbs.
  • Doom 3 box, empty.
  • UT2004 box, without lid, empty.
  • One spoon, large.
  • One paper box, contents unknown.
  • The head of a plastic penguin with red hair and yellow eyebrows.
  • One open packet of coffee grounds.
  • One billion (approx) business cards (own).
  • Three quarters of a billion (approx) business cards (others).
  • One painted wireframe and tissue-mache effigy of me, 8″ tall.
  • One purple, yellow and green feathered mardi gras mask.
  • Nine pens.
  • John Walker’s cafetiere.
  • Three ultrillion sheafs of paper of text that no longer seems to mean anything.
  • One cardboard cutout of me, articulated at joints with gold pins.
  • Twenty issues of PC Gamer.
  • Forty duplicate issues of PC Gamer.
  • One copy of Stereolab’s Emperor Tomato Ketchip: score!
  • One bigillion blank taxi receipts, for expense claim fraud.
  • One Morrowind Ordinator lead figurine, 2″ tall.
  • One City Of Villains scorpion dude plastic figurine 3″ tall.
  • Twelve hundred E3 press discs.
  • Nine hundred hundred unwanted DVDs.
  • One inflatable chain-mace.
  • One inflatable gray (green).
  • One foam Darwinian.
  • One FSP fridge magnet, ugly.
  • One tennis shoe, belonging to Mark Sutherns of Creative Assembly.
  • Seven point nine thousand hundred City Of Villains trial code stickers.
  • Five USB storage devices of between 64MB and 1GB capacity.
  • One Radeon X300 graphics card with a display output socket unrecognisable to the staff of either PC Gamer or PC Format, but which I swear used to plug straight into my regular monitor without fuss.

2 Replies to “Found And Lost”

  1. I’ll give you a fiver for the Darwinian.

    Also, in relation to previous posts, just think how much more fun that tidying would have been with the “Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device” from Portal…

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