TOM FRANCIS
REGRETS THIS ALREADY

This Month In Terrible, Part 1: Anti-DRM T-Shirts

To fight the good fight against the evil legions of Digital Rights Management that are currently making it impossible for anyone on the planet to enjoy music, people who like to steal things have banded together to come up with a T-shirt design that will shame all multinationals into simply cancelling their copy protection plans and releasing all of their music for free, ceasing to exist in the process. Some highlights:

Ohh, now I get it!

Quite a reasonable point.

I- no hang on, what?

Ahh. Right. Well, I think this is clear enough. DRM must be stopped to save the king of puppet-berets from pointing to the trolley of film reels.

The only thing I’m still not sure of is what would actually happen if you did cut the string in this diagram.

Whatever they’re paying the guy who came up with this, it’s not enough.

The gentleman’s protest.

When those suits see this, it’s gonna blow their minds. “That’s- that’s what we were! All along!”

I don’t get this one. Is the dove music, and he’s been locked up but can still fly somehow, or has the dove stolen the padlock of DRM from the olive tree of music and is now taking it to the trash out back?

Intellectual property regulation? Sir, I refer you to my cock.

As a satirical acrostic backronym, this only really fails by one letter.

This may actually be the best diagram ever drawn. I hadn’t realised before how many games and documents from space were simply bouncing off our atmosphere because of the Anti-DRM padlock. We should get rid of that thing. I don’t know why the Australians even built it.

Yeah! Let DRM out of the cage that is music! Music is killing DRM!

I hadn’t really thought about it before, but preventing me from copying music is a little like raping me.

I think we can all agree with whatever the hell this means.

See, because it’s like, DRM is the three-legged green-eyed Giraffe of Dismay, and the RIAA is the elderly man riding it, and that makes people with fans dance like John Travolta.

Yes. This is just like that.

And we all know how rubbish disabled people are.

Isn’t that just kind of annoying?