James

By Pentadact


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Let Tom Francis tell you all what it's like, being male, middle-class and white.
 

 

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"Am I the only one who enjoys the mako combat? I found it nice to be in a pretty easy and fun situation after slogging through all the awesome, but tiring foot combat. I think I had..."

Weird Fish on 2008 In Games That Were Better Than Other Games
 

 

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First Night, Second Life
A surreal break-in on my first night in the ultra-liberal virtual world.
I Played Through Episode 2 Holding A Goddamn Gnome
Postcards from a quest to obtain the stupidest Achievement ever.
 

 

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The Gold Ribbon Goldberg Device

 
 

Every time I come close to thinking I know roughly what I’m going to encounter in the next burnt-out building in Fallout 3, I walk into something like the Gold Ribbon Grocers and shut up.


That’s a baseball pitching machine that triggers the second cascade. The first explosion is a propane tank falling into a bear trap, that burns out the cord on a bunch of dangling grenades, the blast from which ignites the gas that’s been leaking from the oven on the other side of the room, and that ultimately blows the goodies down from out of the loft.

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Remnant: Oh SHIT! I'm a twat for not noticing that whole set up. I just looted all the Abraxo Cleaners (1 WG, 10 caps? Yes please!), and stepped around the plate. I figured it was a trap that would kill me and the arrows were taunting the unprepared.
And I set off the bear trap by walking in it. Man, I missed out.

J-Man: So.... the physics are good?

RC-1290'Dreadnought': It is here that you can see the Oblivion things coming back. Funny stuff.

ZomBuster: I liked it when I did that, Clover got blown up.

Max: Haha! This just happened to me yesterday only I didn't notice anything but the boxes. Dominoes! So I shot the one on the end and watched to my amusement! You can only imagine how surprised I was when the other stuff started to happen...

Roadrunner: Something tells me you don't like me commenting on your blog. :D

Treatise of human nature eh? Well instead, i'll write...something more comical!
Maybe i'll write a book on how a communist utopian society would work without the enforcement of secret police.
...yeah. Thats much more easy to comprehend the the Treatise of Human Nature, which I just googled right now.

J-Man: As you're an expert, Tom, how come I haven't seen Mirror's Edge for PC anywhere? I've tried computer exchange and GAME (yes, the capitals are necessary).

Gamer_V: I'm not a Tom but I can tell you the pc-version has been delayed to sometime next year.

Smurfy: Yeah, it's been delayed until January due to AIDS.

Noc: In a similar vein, I was awfully disappointed when I discovered that the one-year-old you did not, in fact, shout "PHYSICS!" when you'd throw your teddy bear around.

I was listening to the latest Rock Paper Shotgun podcast a bit ago, where they were talking with Eric Wolpaw about Left 4 Dead. They were talking at one point on how they tried to get the voice cues for the characters to echo what the player would be feeling at the moment, whether it was "Oh, I hear a Hunter," or "It's too quiet, here," or "Damnit, who set off the car alarm?"

I heartily wish that Bethesda would think about applying a similar design philosophy to their games. Specifically in having the player and NPCs shout "PHYSICS!" when necessary.

LaZodiac: I was WONDERING what the hell caused those explosions.

Newt Pulsifer: Hey Tom,
Patch 2.0 for galciv2 is out there, since the 5th november (remember, remember!). But maybe you already knew it.. sorry than!

Ben Abraham: I like to think that I've played a fair share of F3... and I have absolutely NO idea where this is...

Remnant: Ben Abraham: I believe it's N/NE of Arefu, the Grocer sitting next to one of the Metro entrances.

And yeah, I know what you mean. I've sunk 20+ hours into the game and haven't uncovered anything in the top half of the map.

Chris Livingston: That's great stuff. Haven't been in there, despite putting about 30 hours into the game. I love to think of all the stuff I haven't found yet.

J-Man: Just finished "Thus spoke Zarathustra"

Official verdict:

WOOT!
I was slightly bothered by his rant on my kind of person... "tarantulas", and the chauvinism was annoying, but all in all, it's an incredible book.

Now someone just needs to explain it to me. Now moving on to "Beyond Good and Evil"

P.S. should I have posted this on the Nietzsche entry, or is this ok?

Roadrunner: Let me correct you there.
You just finished [reading the simple english wikipedia entry on] Thus Spake Zarathustra.
Now moving on to [the simple english wikipedia entry of] Beyond Good and Evil.

... :D

Smee: Oh my goodness, is that seriously the 3rd person walking animation? It's god-awful, they didn't even try!

Pentadact: That's partly my fault Smee - I'm actually walking and strafing at the same time, so I'm moving 45 degrees from where I'm facing. But yeah, the animation just generally sucks.

J-Man: @Roarunner, let me correct you there.

I just finished the BOOK of Thus spoke zarathustra, and now I'm moving onto the BOOK of Beyond Good and Evil. I will then, upon completion of the BOOK of Beyond Good and Evil, purchase the BOOK of Gay Science.

Belcher: @J-Man, you forgot your ':D.'

Roadrunner: Yeah, without the ":D" how am I meant to know we're having a lighthearted banter/trade of stupidity? Now i'm just offended.
Pah.

:D

Roadrunner: Whoops, I only just noticed, You were talking to Roarunner.
Weird, cause I thought you we're talking to me, Roadrunner.
;p

J-Man: You do not deserve your D!

Lack_26: I've been playing L4D this morning, it's far harder than the demo made out, on Blood Harvest, even on normal we were getting our arse handed to us on a platter on the 3rd level, we gave up in the end. Although being up at 5 a.m. to play may have been a contributing factor to our failure.

Pentadact: Yeah, the annoying thing about the demo is it's taught most hardcore gamers to play on Expert, which is utterly unrealistic with a full campaign and so little experience. Also, even if you search for a game on 'Normal', it frequently dumps you in an Expert game without telling you.

After about three failures the guys I was playing with came to their senses and voted to downgrade to Normal, which is - and this was the entire point of several YEARS of work - just right.

Remnant: So what -is- the deal with L4D?
I was told it was out in Australia today, 18th. Go to like four different places, and get told it's not out for another few days. THEN after a night of Fallout, I make a quick scan of my friend's list and see people playing it.

Spewin'.

Roadrunner: I ordered L4D off play.com because it was a few pounds cheaper. :D
Yeah, sure the argument stands for Steam that you get it immedietly (I can't spell that word) but in the end i'll get it. (Unless they fuck up like they did with Dead Space and misplace my order, and I have to wait 21 days to get a refund.)
And there's always TF2 :P
I Wonder if L4D will have updates every so often improving it by adding new maps or weapons, like in TF2?

J-Man: Seeing as the next TF2 update is in 2009, the next L4D one will probably be in 2012.

Bad Neighbor: Awww, maaaaan! I thought that it was just an elaborate death trap. I kept following it until the explosion, only to get myself torched and not know that there was more to it. I went around disarming all the traps and thought that was all there was to it.

 
 

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    Previously, On James...

     
     

    2008 In Games That Were Better Than Other Games     GTA IV Shorts: Cut Off     PC Gamer Podcast: The Future’s Dim     Thoughts On The Team Fortress 2 Christmas Changes     Dear Sir     Extra Mirror’s Edge Levels Blocky, Unrealistic     Dead Space: The Right-Hand Side Of A Good Game     So My Vesper Became Your Chariot     Fallout Girl: The Road To Tenpenny Towers     Revenge Of The Psycho Graverobber     I’m Not Making The Plan Next Time     HERO CLOSET     The Gold Ribbon Goldberg Device     Fallout Girl: Anywhere But Megaton     Bethesda Ruin America     Fallout Girl     Left 4 De-     The American Public Announce That Tom Francis Is Right     Right To Live     Far Cry 2: What I Do Like     Far Cry 2: What I’d Like     Far Cry 2: Impersonation Of A Buddy     New PC Gamer Podcast: Eau De Toilette Radioactifs     Far Cry 2 Released, Forest Fires Up 8000%     !     Deadly Toads Of Death     World Of Goo Is Coming To Steam, Gentlepersons     Trust Me With Your Ears: Volume Three     Plan B Is Complete     The Fate Of The Nation And, More Importantly, My £5     Multiwinia Mathematics     A Stab At Meet The Spy     Clear Screen     Trust Me With Your Ears: Volume Two     Retro Team Fortress 2     Sounds Like The Spy Update Is Next     Status Report     Field Studies 6: The PC Gamer Sporecast     I No Longer Feel I Have To Be James Dean     Plan B Chapter One Is Complete     Field Studies 5: My Spore Review     I Read A Thirty-Eight Page Comic About Google’s Browser     Heroes Of Medicine     Red Versus White     Soviet Power     Plan B Is Live     Trust Me With Your Ears: Volume One     He Looks Truly Mortified     Lumber Yard Wallpapers     Heavy Update Thoughts So Far     Relic Announce That Tom Francis Is Right     Team Fortress 2 Goes To The Rockies     Steel Yourself     Vote Tom Francis In The Games Media Awards     Heavy Update: Sandwiches And Fresh Green Grass     Chris Livingston Stops Considering A TF2 Comic     Seriously, Buy Braid     Braid Is Out On Filthy Consoles     Film Catch-Up     Tweak Fortress     Field Studies 4: Vu To A Thorough Game Demonstration     The Middleman     What’s Happening In Kansas     Mirror’s Edge     Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog     Weltpolizei     The Prop Cigarettes You Smoke, They Show Who You Are     Cutting Verses Down To Size     The Sun Is Shining But We Stay Inside     Mrs D Mrs I Mrs F-F-I, Mrs C Mrs U-L-T     I Propose A Less Serious Vote     Valve Completely Out Of Weapon Ideas, Beg For Help     I Know The Commander Because He’s My Pal     Blizzard Announce That Tom Francis Is Right     Regarding Matt’s Location     Oh My God What The Fuck Barbecue     Cube In Memoriam     Pyro Flare Pistol Thingy Shown In Meet The Sniper     Field Studies 3: My Pretties     Field Studies 2: I Will Save You From The Wangs     Field Studies 1: Sporegasm     Muxed Feelings     You Don’t Have To Be An Engy To Work Here But You Do     Someone Already Made An Ubersaw     Team Fortress 2 Unlockable Ideas     A Riposte To Valve’s Defense Of PC Gaming     Randy Smith Has The Worst Game Design Ideas Ever     Sire, My Regard For You Is This Big     Crysis Suit Modes Revisited     Fractal Hasselhoff And Football Management     What A Shame     The City That Rarely Enters Sleep Mode     The Most Needlessly Complex Terror Plots In Film History     No-One Drove In New York, There Was Too Much Traffic     In One Thousand Two Hundred And Ten New York Minutes     That Band You Like Has A New Thing Coming Out     A Slice Of Fried Gold Rush     Achievement Unlocked: Typed Achievement_Unlock     Bracing Oneself     It’s A Democratic Gaming Landscape, Bitches     Non-Problems Of The Obscenely Over-Privileged     Wanking ‘Not Inappropriate’ To Government Commerce     Dispensing Justice     Getting Owned     This Just In: Frogs Aren’t Morons     Der Uberdoktor     Jon Stewart On Presidential Elitism     I Actually Can’t Stop The Music     Offlyin’     The Life And Inevitable Death Of Bloopi     PC Gamer Blog: Five Years Of Foolishness     Anne Diamond Reviews Games     Fail Dogs     Review: Soulstorm (Fire Indeed Hot)     There Will Be Country For Old Men In Real Life, Baby     The Far Cry 2 Team     PC Gamer Tells Greg Costikyan To Shut The Fuck Up     Valve Decided Against The Overhealer     Austin Translation     Preview: World of Goo     ‘Meet The Scout’ Imminent     PC Gamer Blog: Greatest Videogame Weapon of All Time     Bill Hicks: Another Dead Hero     Vortessence Hangover     Nick Montfort On Portal Vs The Passage     I Eat What I Slaughter     Jonathan Blow On Making Enough Money For Food     Audiosurfing The Shipping News     Team Fortress 2 Badlands Exploit Patched     Lost, Season Four, Spoilers, Obviously     Badlands     James 2.5 Explained     PC Gamer Podcast: March     Chris Livingston Considering A TF2 Comic     Come In     Actors Out Of Context     Murder Incorporated     Books That Make You Dumb     Powered Down For Redesign     New TF2 Maps And Medic Change In Two Months     Molecular Gastronomy Blog     Team Fortress 2 Update Reactions     Things Round Here Have Changed     My Goatee     Things I Forgot To Talk About Round-Up     GalCiv2: Still Genius     Analysing Team Fortress 2     Gamespot Finally Do The Logical Thing     Deus Fucking Ex Fucking 3     Crysis Week: The Endingening     Episode Two Death Maps     Masq     SO… MUCH… CAKE…     On Rock     Review: Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare     I’m Not Allowed To Do This     I Played Through The Crysis Demo Holding A Surprised Korean Guy     The Greatest Spy In Team Fortress 2     FEAR: Perseus Mandate Is The Best Game Ever     Hellgate London Thoughts     Beautiful Piano Rendition Of The Portal Song     I Played Through Episode Two Holding A Goddamn Gnome     Pushing Daisies Continues To Be Incredible     Ten Minutes To Go     The Best Three Things On TV     Life Complete     This Just In: The Scout Is A Dick     Not Being A Spy     SO… MUCH… BLOOD…     Weirdly, You’ve Been Tanned - Suspicious For The Winter     Structurally Superfluous     Top of GameTab: Wikipedia Edits From Sony IP     Heroes Season Two     My Favourite Disaster     Quick BioShock Warning     Rock, Paper, Shotgun     British Airwaves     BioShock Review Review     Gollum Beat Box Like You Never Seen     The Machine Of Death Winners     System Failure     The Order of the Phoenix     The Completist: Tribes: Vengeance     Quickly     Boston and Bioshock     Cloak And Tagger     Gamespot Finally Do The Logical Thing     The Completist: Far Cry     This Month In Terrible, Part 2: London Olympics Logo     This Month In Terrible, Part 1: Anti-DRM T-Shirts     The Finale Post     Not The Finale Post     Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa-     Starcraft 2     Grrraaahahahahaa!     Mystery Trip     Access Denied     Invasion of the Body Snatchers     New-Album Deathmatch     Can I Just Say (3)     Back!     ‘Iv’     Desktop Tower Defense     Whoa     Noble Jedis     I Don’t Know About You Folks     Infinitely More Exciting Than Anything     Exploded     A Couple Of Things!     This Is Taking Ages     Best Interview Ever     Let Them Eat Facts     He’s Gone Too Far     Highlight Of 2006 (3/3)     Highlight Of 2006 (2/3): Snowboarding To Safety     Highlight Of 2006 (1/3): Previewing Oblivion     Yeah, Me Too     Somerfield     24     iPwn     2006     First Screenshots Of Introversion’s Next Game     Dexter: Series One     Woo     Dexter Again     Primer     Just ‘Cause     Spoiler Test     Heroes     Not Everything You Find On Flickr Makes A Lot Of Sense Right Away     Posts About Games Writing Suck So I’m Writing A Post About Posts About Games Writing     Supreme Commander     A Weak Russian Sunset     Event-Inspired Idea: Cellphone Breathalizer     I Am About To Play One Of These Games     Dexter     Bad News     24: Drink When…     Blood Money And Sex     Veronica Mars     Too Zune     Something I Didn’t Understand But Still Feels Right     James 1.0     Dangerous Animals Found Dangerous, Term Remains Mystery     Don’t Blog While Stupid     Should I Hit The Weak Spot For Massive Damage Now?     25th Hour     Porn Shoes     A Life In Questions     Paris Laptop Consciousness Drip     This Next Test Is Impossible     Found And Lost     Team Fortress 2, Episode Two And Portal     Not Lasting     Pandora’s Checkbox     Episode Three Conjecture     Episode Two Conjecture     Trivia: My Firefox Extensions     Half-Life 3: Episode 1     Can I Just Say     Top 100 Musings #1: Battlefield 2     Maths Cop 2: The Revengening     Waa?     Out Of Office Auto-Blog     Oblivion Review     I Took A Photograph Of You In The Herbacious Border     If Things Go Right     New Ritual     Favourites     World Of Lifecraft     Elsewhere     Some News, JC     This Is The Winter Of Our Disco Tent     Villainy Like It Oughta Be     FEAR     Battlefield 2 Stats     Brain Storm’s New Clothes     Fahrenheit     Sorry     Quote From What I’m Watching     NaNoWriMo - Hard FAQs     Mockba     SWAT 4: The Game     First Night, Second Life     Disappointing Results     Maths Cop!     NaNoWriMo     Google Oozes Connectivity     Lost Season 2     Serenity     Oh Screw It, I’ll Mention The Revolution     Flying     Introducing: Brain Storm     Concerned     This Month In Awesome     Rain     SWAT 4: The Movie     On Bringing It     State Of Things     Quest Ideas     Quest Que C’est?     WordPress Wizard     Reasons To Freeze To Death     Phew     Futurama     The West Wing     Firefly     Lost     The Great     The Fantastic     The Top Few     Mulholland Drive     Adaptation     Grosse Pointe Blank     Memento     LA Confidential     Diablo 2     Battlefield 2     Half-Life 2: Deathmatch     Deus Ex 2     N     Morrowind     Half-Life 2     Deus Ex     Charles Darwin     Friedrich Nietzsche     Ludwig Wittgenstein     Tom Francis